Embarrassed and feeling like a disgrace. Not wanting to leave my bed let alone my house. Feeling like an asshole, a loser. Hurting the person i love who makes me the happiest, who has been the first to fully complete me, the first to fully understand and support me. Fucking up in life once again, wishing I could for once do something right and make someone happy without hurting them. Guilt eating me alive. Shared friends hating me.. Leading to lost friends and loved ones. Close teachers feeling betrayed. All due to one stupid mistake, one action that could have been stopped one thing that could have been prevented if I just stopped to think, causing this huge scene of non stop chaos.